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Posts Tagged ‘fatigue’

Not long now…

til my exam, so I have been furiously studying today!

I love learning all the A and P stuff, just wish I didn’t have the stress of worrying about remembering it for the exam!

I have been having a bad fatigue day today, the 2-day heatwave we had meant a loss of sleep so I have been very sleepy and very thirsty and weak today, every time I’ve stood up I’ve had to rush whatever I’m doing to sit back down again asap, as I’ve been much more tachycardic and faint than usual for me. However, studying hard took my mind off it to some extent and I felt a little bit like the old Laura, the one who used to get a real buzz and excitement from learning and study. I’ve always loved to learn and one of the biggest frustrations of having pots has been how that has made it harder to focus and concentrate due to the fatigue- I find that a few hours of studying leaves me feeling weak and dizzy as if I’ve been running on a treadmill. However, I’ve managed to push through it as best I can and for the most part enjoyed it.

Funnily enough, I took a little break to watch my favourite TV show- Grey’s Anatomy- and since I’ve been studying this anatomy and physiology, things they say on the show now make sense to me! For example, today during the ‘morbidity and mortality’ meeting, Dr Burke spoke of a patient who died of a CVA. I never knew what a CVA was but after having studied, despite never having seen it abbreviated that way, my brain went- “Oh they mean a cerebro-vascular accident!” ( a stroke in layman’s terms). Then I felt all giddy with myself for understanding ‘doctor speak’ hehehe.

I’m also really excited about starting up my reflexology business when I’ve got my qualification. I keep getting hypnosis clients and thinking- if I can persuade them to try reflexology after I’ve treated them with hypnosis, they might become a regular customer, then pass my details on to a friend or family member- and it will all start building up- which is really exciting! I love helping people, it gives me a real buzz and makes me feel great. I sometimes have this crazy notion of helping people with POTS and ME to lead better lives with reflexology helping reduce their symptoms, and being THE go-to person for treatment so that people travel from all over to come and see me, as not only are my treatments grand but I also understand first hand what it’s like (wow, that wasn’t meant to be so rhymey lol).  Although then I think of the practicalities of people being scattered around the country and our inability to travel long distances- I can’t get to them due to being a potsy myself and they probably can’t get to me- so I regard it as just being fanciful but even if I don’t ever get to help potsies it’s great to help people in general- plus the scope for expansion is great- I’m thinking of doing fertility and maternity reflexology and baby reflexology too.

So, it’s a tiring time and my social life is suffering vastly as I haven’t the time much less the energy for social events, I think some of my less-understanding friends are going to be peeved with me behind my back but I’m not concerned, I’m doing this for myself and my future- true friends will understand that and not take my lack of being sociable lately personally!

One thing I am very much looking forward to with quite girlish giddy excitement is a day trip to the space centre with my partner… it’s quite romantic for us as it’s the place where we went on our first proper ‘date’ and the day we got together 2 years ago- we are going on our anniversary next Monday! It should be a fun day plus a day that’s also filled with happy memories.

I’m not going to the walking group’s summer ball this year 😦 It’s really disappointing, but the venue is in a small semi underground bar and you can’t go outside after 10pm, yet it’s just as expensive as the previous years have been when it was held at nice hotels with posh lawned gardens and grounds. I have decided not to go because I think that with everyone being crammed inside it will just be too noisy and crowded to enjoy, plus it’s not at all like a ball because the venue is just not right. Sad because I look forward to this event all year as I love a good social occasion and a chance to dress up, but this year it’s not for me. I will therefore be saving my pennies for an upcoming holiday with my bf, something I am very much looking forward to as it will be so nice to get away together and relax. 🙂

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I’ve always walked when things have been bothering me (like when I’m stressed, or need to clear my head or make a tough decision), but since finding out I have POTS, I’ve sometimes made the decision not to at times when I’m really tired, out of fear of it making me feel worse.

Today, I wasn’t having the best day. I’ve been super tired, dizzy and listless. It got me feeling down in the dumps, and frustrated as my specialist has not yet replied to my GP about what medication I can have next as I can’t continue with florinef before and during my upcoming trip to Peru.

In the early evening, I was feeling like some fresh air, but was unsure whether it was a good idea given that I was feeling weak and drained. However, I thought to myself- well, I had POTS for approximately 9 years before it was diagnosed and didn’t know walking could tire me and thus never let it stop me. I’ve pretty much just lived with chronic fatigue but always managed to stay active.  So I figured a walk couldn’t hurt.

Well, after the walk I felt I had MORE energy not less! I think it was helped by the fact my friend called me while I was walking and we had a good chat on the phone, but I was still surprised as I wasn’t expecting to feel as much improvement as I did. It didn’t last that long mind, if anything I feel more weak and shaky now, but even if that’s because of walking it was worth it because it must have released some endorphines or something because I feel in a much better mood and my head is clearer. I’m tired, but the apathy lifted. I’m hoping I feel as clear in the mind tomorrow because I want to start my reflexology coursework!

Additional:

My bf is sweet, I usually stay over Friday and Saturday nights, but as I’ve been feeling so tired on no medication, I felt I needed to stay home this evening to get more rest. Even though he saw me twice during the week and will be seeing me tomorrow, he still called me tonight for a chat. 🙂

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